Feminism

Dear Reader, 

One of my facebook friends posted someone's list of injustices done to men because of feminism.  It was an exhausting read because of the repetition, blanket statements and unbelievable statistics.  The list was clearly written in anger, and I just don't agree with most of it.

Wait a second...now you think I'm a feminist!  Well, the joke's on you.  Knowing what the Bible says about men and women prevents me from being getting caught in the riptide of feminism.  However, I am very curious about how the whole movement started.  I recently read in a history book that Betty Friedan's The Feminine Mystique (1963) served as the "Bible of the feminist movement."  I want to know what all of the fuss was about.  I ordered a copy (so that I can make my own notes and Scripture references in the margins), and it should be here tomorrow.  

One description of the book says: "Friedan maintained that the post-World War II emphasis on family forced women to think of themselves primarily as housewives and robbed them of much of their creative potential."  

So I wonder: Is every homemaker or stay-at-home mom robbed of her creative potential?  Or is she exactly where she should be in order to let her creativity blossom within the context of what the Lord calls her to do?  You may call me biased, because I love being at home.  I love impressing my husband by making our weekend mess sparkling clean.  The undeniable convenience of handling business affairs during business hours blesses us, as well.  I get to experiment in the kitchen; I don't have to rely on Hungry Man to feed my hungry man.  I take care of situations requiring immediate attention (if our flatware rusts and we need to find a new set, pronto, I can be at the department store scouring shelves the same day).  And I'm learning tricks to stretch a dollar (we make up for having one income in the Bay Area by my close eye on the budget).  

I also get to write to you about my experiences and my walk with the Lord. 

Then there are the stay-at-home moms, and they're in a league of their own.  I was a nanny and a preschool teacher for years, and while I learned some of the skills every mom at home needs, I don't believe I scratched the surface of what they do.  They're on-call 24/7; I got to go home at the end of the day, and I had weekends!  They do all of the things I do (and more) with a toddler crying at their feet.  A friend who gave birth to her second son four days after our wedding threw both my bridal shower and bachelorette party (did I mention her first son hit his "terrible twos" early?).  At what point wasn't she realizing her creative potential?

Now, tell me, should she go back to school and try to make it as a rocket scientist because having a  family robbed her of her creative potential?  I think she'd be pretty busy trying to fulfill all of her responsibilities at home with that added commitment; there would have to be sacrifice.  I mentioned that I worked in childcare for awhile.  While it was great to be employed by my natural instincts and to get attached to some sweet kids, knowing that some were there from the time the school opened to after closing time (that means over eleven hours) broke my heart.  And sometimes, a child would turn from obedience as soon as his parents walked through the door, craving attention and discipline from those responsible for him.  Children are the first to face sacrifice when a mom neglects her duties at home. 

But feminism dictates that fulfilling household and family duties isn't enough.  Women have cast each other down trying to bring each other up.  Now we face our duties at home in addition to maintaining full-fledged careers.  And when the men, tired from doing their own jobs, don't instinctively pitch in at home, resentment builds, and Satan fans the flame of hatred. 

I have a lot more to say, and once I begin reading The Feminine Mystique with my Bible next to me, I will share further insight.  To anyone reading, please don't take offense to what you think I may be implying; instead, think about what I've said.  This is a sensitive topic, especially for my generation, as we never experienced a time before "girl power."  There are many more issues to be addressed.  We'll get there. 

Blessings today and everyday,

adguglielmo

Proverbs 31:10-31

Marriage Full of Hope

Dear Reader, 

This morning, I had good fellowship with a friend from church.  When my husband and I got engaged, she stepped up and offered to help keep us organized.  Anyone who has planned a wedding (especially in a short time period) knows the importance of being organized.  I got to know her as we met to discuss our progress, and she got to know a very cranky version of me.  Still, she pressed on, and in spite of the near arrival of her grandson (he was delivered four days after the wedding), she helped us to and through our "big day."  Needless to say, I was grateful to be able to sit down and really talk for the first time after the wedding.

Today, she and her husband are celebrating their 30th anniversary.  Where I come from, exchanging the wrong glance warrants divorce.  It wasn't until I moved to San Jose and started attending Grace Bible Fellowship that I really got to know people who carry out long and successful marriages.  Of course, that was my aspiration (and now my commitment) as I dated my husband.  But toward the end of our engagement, fear crept in and I started wondering if I would be able to accomplish anything but the cycle of divorce that runs generations deep in my family.  I knew that when I got married, that would be that.  After, the choice couldn't be whether or not to stay, but whether to allow myself to be miserable through our future trials together, or whether to accept everything from God with thanksgiving  (Ecclesiastes 7:14).  Obviously, the fear subsided and I realized that the Lord had provided this man to be my husband.  And I was able to step forward and make my second biggest commitment (my first being to God). 

Today, Josh and I have been married for three months.  Small potatoes, I know.  But anyone who has celebrated a 30th, 40th or 50th anniversary started out with one month, one year, one decade.  I so look forward to all of the milestones my husband and I will share.  Unlike the secular world, I am able to say that my marriage and my commitment before God will not fail.  Because Josh and I united on the foundation of Christ with the Holy Spirit dwelling within each of us, we will be able to live out our vowed love for one another.  We will struggle through the trials set before us together.  We must!  What is the alternative?  I know I didn't have one in mind as I vowed to love, honor and submit to my husband, til death do us part. 

I am grateful for my friend's openness about her marriage and the trials they have pushed through.  I admire her strength and will to submit to her husband in spite of his many years without the Lord.  Praise Jesus for saving Him several years ago!  It sounds like we're both working on the same things in our marriages, which teaches me that Josh and I will never be perfect.  But oddly, it's very encouraging to hear that even though my friend has been married for so long, she and her husband are still working together to be better.  I pray that I never reach a state of complacency in my marriage; I pray that I will always make growing together toward Jesus and glorifying Him my utmost priority.  And while that means we are bound to face trials and growing pains, I hope I will stumble upon this message again in the midst of that tribulation, and that I will be encouraged by my current vigor. 

I hope to encourage you, as well.  Always feel free to leave comments and let me know what you're thinking.  I pray that the Lord blesses you in your marriage as He has blessed me.  Remember today that intense hope and love you felt on your wedding day, and may you carry that through to an act of love (a simple kiss on the cheek will suffice) toward your husband.     

God bless you,

adguglielmo