A Temple for God

"Do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own?  For you were bought at a price; therefore, glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God's"-1 Corinthians 6:19, 20.

Dear Reader,

My husband and I are competing to see who can lose eight pounds first.  So far, we've trudged through a level one "8 Minute Abs" video, and we haven't had dessert all week. 

The dedicated road to weight loss seems much easier together.  All my life, I've struggled with poor body image.  For years and years, I made my major goal losing weight.  I had academic, life and spiritual goals, too, but they never took first place.  Instead, I focused on my body.  With all of the effort and energy I expended, I should have gotten in shape and been satisfied.  However, I gained ten pounds one year, five pounds the next, and ten pounds more.  I was crushed.

I can't trace my battle with food back to a specific date, but I know some of my greatest struggles began at age 15.  First, I tried convincing myself that I didn't have to eat (what a glamorous life I could live at 80 pounds!).  I listed every crumb that I consumed, calculating fat grams and carbs.  At night, I would lie awake, budgeting calories for the next day.  Quartering portions made my head ache, from both over thinking and hunger.  By the end of the week, I would take my measurements and discover I had lost a couple of inches.  And then I would overeat.  I would try so hard not to eat  and then make up for all that I had deprived myself of during the week.  I would remeasure on Sunday and discover my bloated belly added a few inches to what I had to lose.  So on Monday, I would resume my "orderly" plan.

This sort of eating phased in and out throughout the years.  At times, it was replaced by fasting completely.  Other times, I ate more than several grown men could in a day.  Purging cycled through from the time I was 16.  Needless to say, I was out of control.

Until fairly recently, this struggle with food overshadowed everything else in life.  It consumed my mind, as drugs consume the mind of a user.  I wondered how much I could accomplish if I weren't always thinking about food and my figure.  I desperately wanted to stop abusing my body.  I reached out to the church for help.  I reached out to fellow believers online in chat rooms dedicated to encouraging healthy, godly lifestyles.  I attended a church recovery group for people once addicted to drugs and alcohol. I started seeing a Christian counselor.  I prayed constantly.  I meditated on verses like 1 Corinthians 10:31: "Whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do all for the glory of God" (I thought that one was written just for me!).  But no matter what I did, I just couldn't stop. 

Here's the key: I wouldn't stop.  I had it wrong all those years.  Had I really believed 1 Corinthians 10:13 ("God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it"), I would have known that my actions could not be attributed to anyone but me.  Yes, the tempter tempted me very effectively.  Even when God's "way of escape" arrived crystal clear, I took things into my own hands and rejected His provision.  I repeatedly made the mistake of thinking that eating would make me feel better, even though I always felt worse afterward.  And the whole time, I kept wondering, Lord!  I'm praying for Your help!  Why aren't You helping me?    

I made two major discoveries.  The first, before I stopped abusing God's temple, was Colossians 3:1-3: "If then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ is, sitting at the right hand of God.  Set your mind on the things above, not on things on the earth.  For you died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God."  Where had I set my mind?  Certainly not on my life with Christ in God!  In spite of all of my pleading prayers, my mind remained on the things on the earth (my body).  Though my heart greatly desired the ability to just eat like a normal person, without having to miss meals with family and friends because of a diet, and without blowing off events with those same people to sit at home overeating, I thought if I trusted the Lord to guide me to eat properly, I would never lose weight.  I couldn't get past my earthly body.

The period between abusing food and enjoying God's provision perplexes me.  Again, I can't point to a specific date and say, "I was healed this day!"  But I know the Lord used the building up of my relationship with my husband and his family to produce my new, healthy approach to eating.

An Old Testament verse explained away my confusion about why the Lord "wasn't helping me."  Isaiah 59:1,2 says: "Behold, the Lord's hand is not shortened, that it cannot save; nor His ear heavy, that it cannot hear.  But your iniquities have separated you from your God; and your sins have hidden His face from you, so that He will not hear."  Why didn't God remove my burden as soon as I prayed for help?  It's because my willful sin caused a separation between us that prevented Him from hearing my prayers.  I was disobedient and thought I knew what was best for me.  I continued to disregard the command to glorify God in my body.  How could He hear me when I continuously profaned what belonged to Him?

I praise the Lord for softening my heart and enabling me to seek the things above.  I am far more concerned with exercising myself toward godliness (1 Timothy 4:8) now that Satan's lies about food and my body have been dusted out of my head.  I mentioned the competition between my husband and I because I'm thankful to finally put weight loss in perspective.  Thinking about my physical flaws no longer fills up the day.  Instead of thinking about how to look more like Twiggy, I think about how to become more like Christ.  My husband will probably win the competition, and he will receive due reward.  But I'm just so thankful to be able to eat with a grateful heart!

Because this temptation and sin took up much of my life, I pray that God will use me to comfort those who are struggling, just as He has comforted me (2 Corinthians 1:4).  Let me know how I may be of service to you today.

God bless His children, 

adguglielmo

A Modification

Dear Reader, 

Lord willing, this will really be my last post on feminism.  It wouldn't be fair to you to end as I did when I've since been enlightened with more truth.  A great thanks to my mother-in-law for shedding the light on something new.  

Over tea last week, she asked me, "When do you think feminism began?"  "It was the late nineteenth century, around the Victorian period," I answered, based on what I had learned from high school history classes and The Feminine Mystique.  Then we turned to the New Testament:

"Every woman who prays or prophesies with her head uncovered dishonors her head, for that is one and the same as if her head were shaved.  For if a woman is not covered, let her also be shorn.  But if it is shameful for a woman to be shorn or shaved, let her be covered... Does not nature itself teach you that if a man has long hair, it is a dishonor to him?  But if a woman has long hair, it is a glory to her"-1 Corinthians 11:5-6, 14-15.

What authority does Paul have over hairstyles?  Why do women have to wear hats while praying?  And what does this have to do with feminism? 

If we look back a few verses, we will see the natural, God-given hierarchy in 1 Corinthians 11:3: "I want you to know that the head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God." 

God

Christ

Man

Woman

Now look back at the word "head" in red.  Given the context, we discover that a woman does not dishonor the head balanced by her neck when she prays uncovered; rather, she dishonors her husband, who is the head of his wife.  Feminism dishonors men.  Further, a husband who assumes the submissive role (in this case, by covering his head) dishonors his spiritual head, which is Christ. 

These verses pertain to our lives now and to the lives of men and women around 57 A.D., when Paul wrote his first letter to the Corinthians.  That means feminism has been around a lot longer than we read about in our history books.  I hadn't recognized feminism as such a prominent, ongoing form of disobedience.  Of course, the word of God addresses everything, and there is nothing new under the sun (Ecclesiastes 1:9).  Again, I thank my mother-in-law for leading me to the Bible for answers.  

From further research, I discovered many debates on the meaning of the first 16 verses of 1 Corinthians.  I found a helpful resource here: http://www.gty.org/resources/sermons/1844

While I don't agree with everything (like the pastor's disrespectful comment about the church), this sermon debunks many a question about these verses.  He made a great point about the natural order, saying that Christian feminists who believe women are not meant to be in submission to their husbands must also believe that men are not in submission to Christ, and that Christ is not in submission to God.  Why, then, would Jesus hang on the cross if He were not in submission to His Father's glorious plan?

Paul indicates submission by citing distinct physical features in verses 14 and 15 (women have long hair; men have short hair).  The women who were cutting their hair short defied the conventional appearances of women; in order to defy the natural order, they were shorn.  We see another action resulting from the flawed feminist attitude dating back far before the "roarin' '20s."  A woman's shaved head represented her insubordination, while a man's long hair indicated his nonacceptance of his role as the head of his wife.  It's not really about the hair!  During those times, those hairstyles did relay an underlying attitude.  But these days, a woman cuts her hair short because it's convenient, and a man grows it long because he skateboards.  I would say that's fine and good as long as they each have an attitude of submission to the headship of a husband and Christ.

Paul further emphasizes the different roles by telling women to cover their heads and men to leave theirs uncovered.  Does that mean we ought to show up to church in our Easter bonnets every Sabbath?  I should hope not!  Instead, knowing our roles of submission, we ought to cover ourselves modestly to bring honor to our heads.

These verses on head coverings always threw me for a loop.  I wondered why so few women in the church wore hats, but if I should start wearing one, too.  I now understand how these verses pertain to the roles of men and women and the ways in which we ought to be in submission.  I highly recommend listening to the sermon I used for reference (I read the transcript on an external site before discovering the audio!).  One of the best ways I absorb the word of God is by listening while cleaning my apartment; it helps me remember Whom I'm serving as I scrub the counters.  

Thank You for this day, Lord.  I pray that You will enlighten Your people to understand the words of Your mouth.  Help us to be in submission so that we may glorify You in the order You laid out for us.  We love You and praise You for all that You are and all that You are doing in us, God.  Amen.

Have a blessed day of discovery!

adguglielmo        

 

The Flawed Feminist Attitude

Dear Reader, 

 A few weeks ago, as I read more about some of the first textbook feminists (those who earned women the right to their wages and the right to vote), I became conflicted.  I had just proudly voted in the primaries, so I wondered how I could possibly condemn the women who fought for that right.  And where would I be, had I not been allowed to keep my wages?  How could I have afforded to move to San Jose before my husband and I became engaged?  How would I have paid for my apartment before we made the commitment to get married...and then live together?   

At the same time, I noticed a certain tone in modern people and publications.  In women, I found an air of significance and superiority.  I found an example of this in a statement about the rise in persecution of men, which was gleefully dismissed with something wicked like, "Oh, how the tables have turned."  In men, I discovered weakness and complacency regarding their roles as protectors of the family.  A Mercury News regular commended the new kick-butt girl movies hitting theaters ("The Hunger Games," "Snow White and the Huntsman," "Brave").  Then he went on to say that he would be the one wiping his wife's brow as she wielded a bow, complaining that he was tired of climbing up tall towers to save princesses.  What a backwards world we live in!

Our society no longer rears men but overflows with boys in the adult life.  It begins with the feminist attitude that says, "Anything you can do I can do better."  If that's the case, then why would a man provide for his family?  Woman can do it better, so let her!  Women can also pay for their own meals, drive their own cars and open up doors.  Really, what good are men?  

See the flawed feminist attitude? It's the key difference between those first noted "feminists" who were fighting to rightfully obtain equal treatment, and today's feminists, who are fighting to be better than everyone else.   For awhile, I wrestled with the knowledge that prior to the twentieth century, women were treated as lesser people.  For some reason, I couldn't comprehend that our society has not always been on a constant downward slope.  But I realized that there are peaks, as when our country liberated the slaves.  One of those peaks belongs to discovering the equality of men and women.  A steeper slope belongs to the idea that men and women were not created equally in the likeness of God. 

Most of my discovery has come from observing the world, talking with wise Christian women and knowing the Proverbs 31 woman had enough on her plate to make her equal, but not superior to a man (her husband was known at the gates, remember?).  I am thankful to live in place that recognizes equality, because I can't wait to vote in the presidential election this year (Your will be done, Lord).  But I'm still sad knowing the enemy's abundant perversion of truth, which encompasses today's feminism.  

I'm not sure why I began my study or what I expected to discover, but I am so grateful to the Lord for allowing me to understand.  I pray that you will understand, too, and that He will guide us to those who are lost, so that we may teach them His everlasting truth.  

What a journey...
adguglielmo   

The Effects of Feminism on Motherhood

Dear Reader, 

I’ve chosen a dangerously hot topic to study.  I’ve taken a lot of time to think about what I’m reading, as well as some time to talk to seasoned women in the church, and I think I’ve come near the end of what I thought would be a much longer research project.  I’m not finished with The Feminine Mystique, and I’ll keep reading, but I think just a few blog entries suffice to summarize the effects of feminism.  If the body or the book reveal something else to me, I’ll be sure to let you know. 

As I said, feminism is a hard topic to talk about, even in the church.  I note that especially in regard to my own generation, as the attitude toward having a family and raising children seems to have changed.  A chapter in The Feminine Mystique is devoted to relaying the author’s incredulous attitude toward the majority of women in the 1950s who followed their hearts’ desires and became wives and mothers.  They thought that was all they wanted.  But no, Betty Friedan reveals: They were wrong!  They were unsatisfied!  Once they achieved that ultimate purpose, they were left wondering, “Is this it?” 

I talked to my grandma about this.  She came of age in the 1950s and started a family of her own.  She said she didn’t know a single wife who fit the role of that stereotype we all know.  My grandma didn’t fill those shoes, either.  She was restless like everyone else Betty Friedan interviewed for her book.  I worried that this fact would prove contrary to the point I am trying to make, but then something stood out: My grandma wasn’t yet saved. 

I notice a detachment in people who aren’t walking with the Lord.  The hairdresser I last saw thought it was great that I’m at home now, but she said I’ll want to be far from it when I have children of my own.  Another woman at the bank relayed how tired she was from “babysitting” her son the previous day.  She had to watch him all day long!  My heart went out to that family.  Indicated at other points in the conversation, these women clearly weren’t saved.  The Lord must put something in His women in order to make them real, nurturing mothers.  Otherwise, we’re all just people floating alongside each other in this world, and one’s own is no different from another’s.   

Feminism has affected motherhood by telling women that they should be more.  I’ll admit, sometimes I fall under this false judgment, too, even before taking that leap.  This rampant, evil, unjust judgment condemns the hearts of those who are doing exactly what they are called to do.  It’s so sad to see this affect the lives of children who were brought into the world by no choice of their own. 
Being a mother is hard.  I do not speak from experience, but observation (and I am working to prepare myself for that prized position which I one day wish to hold).  I pray that you mothers will not feel the unnecessary guilt with which Satan weighs women down.  If you are a mother doing everything as unto the Lord, you are fulfilling the perfect role for you.  Don’t listen to the accuser who tells you that you aren’t enough.  What an undertaking being a full-time parent is!  And what an honor you are to the Lord. 

This is not meant to exclude those of you in the church who have the gift of singleness, those who have chosen not to have children or those who are employed single mothers.  If you’re following God’s plan for your life, you are an honor to Him, as well.  I am speaking for the faithful mothers because they are attacked by Satan through feminism.  Betty Friedan, a mother, does not condemn motherhood itself.  Rather, she discourages taking on motherhood as a full-time job, as a title, as a source of fulfillment.  But that’s just not fair to the women obedient to the Word who have made the decision to wholeheartedly raise their own families.  
      
You can see, if not live out, how difficult it is to be a full-time mom in a world that says, “Well, what else are you?”  Can you see how the feminist movement brought us here?  And can you see the sneaky role Satan has played behind the scenes of the movement that intended to exalt women? 
I pray that we will all remember to look at ourselves as God looks at us, not as the world looks at us.  As believers, we are promised persecution and tribulation.  But if we make it our mission to glorify Him in all things, we will overcome and be fulfilled (as much as we can be in our fallen state) by whatever life plan the Lord has laid out for us. 

May the Lord keep you,  
adguglielmo 

“There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit”-Romans 8:1.